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Trust in the timing of your life! ☀️

This statement resonates volumes to me and I’m sure also to many of you. Yet, we still can’t seem to find it in ourselves to actually sit back and trust time. When was the last time you let yourself not worry about anything, at all? Not one single thing. If you’re anything like me, it was probably last night while you were sleeping. Then you woke up, and it was right back to the same routine. Your constant ‘what if’s’. The absolute absurd theories that couldn’t possibly EVER happen to you (right?). The anxiety, feeling like an elephant is sitting on your chest, feeling like your drowning, feeling like you’ll never overcome it (whatever ‘it’ is today), feeling like you’re never going to be good enough. Boy, the struggle is real, huh?! It’s so fucked up how as a society we have been taught to be scared shitless of speaking out loud about the battles we are silently fighting. That it’s not okay, to not be okay. When the hell did that become acceptable! I for one will shout from the rooftops to anyone that will listen, that I am not okay! Because if sharing my stories of how I’ve fucked up, of my pain, of my anxiety, of the depression. If I share MY demons. If letting other people who are also struggling know that there is someone out there that is okay with not being okay, with not being the “picture perfect” image of what this world tells us we are supposed to be and is STILL making it. Maybe then they’ll see they really aren’t alone. Then maybe they won’t want to give up as quickly as they wanted to before….

If we all just learned to trust in the timing of our lives, instead of wanting to just give up the second we run head first into a brick wall or maybe it’s actually your 12th brick wall (you still can’t give up yet). Or when to you, life literally feels like it couldn’t possibly get any worse… TRUST IN THE TIMING OF YOUR LIFE! Trust in your future. The pain you edure today is only preparing you for the amazing adventure the very same life has in store for you tomorrow. I use the term tomorrow loosely. It might be a week, month, or 5 years from now. But, you have an incredible future waiting for you if you just decide to believe in yourself and have a little faith! 

It could always be so much worse. That is something I’ve had to really, really work hard to teach myself to remember. There will always be someone in this world who is going through something so much worse than what it is you are facing. Now I’m in no way saying that to make your battle any less important. I say that so you can focus your perspective. It’s amazing how capable we are of having a positive mindset and using it, if we just TRY to remember how good our lives actually are. All it takes is a little bit of effort. You’ll be amazed at the difference you will start to see in yourself, if you just take simple steps to change things in your life. Baby steps, that’s all it takes. It isn’t going to happen overnight, and it’s not going to be the easiest thing at first, Rome wasn’t built in a day…. If the one thing you do is wake up everyday, look in the mirror, and tell yourself, “I CAN do this!”. You are sending yourself and your mind in the right direction, and that’s with just 4 words! Imagine what else you can do. The power of you, it’s LIFE CHANGING! 

Now all you have to do is trust in your timing! 🙂

Happy Reading!

XOXOXOX, Caitlin

Man oh man….

Life has been absolutely crazy, and even that is a complete understatement. Sorry it has been so long since my last post, I’ll do better…. 

Have you ever found yourself looking in the mirror and wondering why you’re  here? Like, what is your purpose? What exactly were you put on the Earth to accomplish? If not, you obviously don’t spend enough time in the bathroom. Haha! This has been my thought process for about the past month. I’m either on the brink of a mental breakthrough or a mental breakdown. 

Life has this funny way (and I use that term loosely) of deciding that even when we feel like we can’t possibly take anymore of the bullshit it wants to throw at us, it says “hey why not plan a meteor shower and blast your ass!” Thanks a lot life, you fucking suck! But in the end, we always manage to survive what we thought would absolutely destroy us. Our first heartbreak, our 8th heartbreak. Being fired from our first job. Falling flat on our face in front of that really cute guy or girl, who we never stood a chance with anyway and turns out they actually were the reason the entire office got herpes (bahahaha, thanks life for saving our ass from that one!) My point is, we never truly know what our silver lining is, but it’s ALWAYS there. You just have to look past all the fairytale, Grey’s Anatomy, it happened in the movies, bullshit – and find yours. Because I promise – if you look hard enough, it’s usually staring right back at you in the mirror! 🙋🏼


XOXOX, Caitlin 

Why?

There have been so many times I have become painstakingly paralyzed by this word. Has anyone ever realized the power one word could hold over your ENTIRE life? Has it ever occurred to you that you were setting a trap for yourself just by asking a question? Or worse, by asking someone else this question? Not everyone’s brain is wired to know how to properly give people an answer to this fucking horrible excuse for a word, that gives most people on this planet – me (if anyone really wants to know) such a feeling of emptiness, when that “right answer” isn’t given. 

Why don’t you have your shit together? 

Why don’t you look like her?

Why don’t your kids act like Greek gods?

Why aren’t you better?

Why aren’t you smarter?

Why aren’t you skinner?

Why aren’t you prettier?

Why don’t you guys just get along?

Why do you take that medicine?

Why did you do that?

Why didn’t you do that? 

Why did you let that happen?

Why didn’t you let that happen?

Why aren’t you ready yet? 

Why aren’t you happy? 

I’m sure you all have caught on to my point. This definitely isn’t one of my long, motivational posts. It isn’t a happy post. It’s a post that comes from a broken place, a very real place. However, a place that is just as real as the happy place in the reader you all read before this. I’m the exact same person. I want you all to understand me, for me. I’m complex. Another reason I started writing. 

For all the times I was asked why… here is my answer. Why not? 

Happy Reading!

XOXOXO, Caitlin

Here goes nothing… 

It’s always a challenge trying to figure out the wording to a post. Do I just go full force and use complete, brutal honesty for whatever the topic is for that day? Or do I go with a subtle and more easygoing standpoint? I will usually end up asking myself regardless, “Do you actually care whether you sound like Mother Theresa or if you sound like an absolute bitch?” and in the realm of completely honesty, I don’t really give a shit, at all.  So I thought about it, and thought about it, and fucking thought about it some more. “What do you want your first REAL piece to be about?” Y’all, want to know what I finally decided? – I’m going to start by asking a question. (Jaw hits floor… it took all that time for a damn question bahahah, just give her up now, hahaha!) Seriously though, it isn’t just “any” question. I wanted it to be one that you really have to put some thought into, in every way possible, before you start throwing out any random answer that you think sounds good. I’m not looking for typical or cliche. You know, the answers everyone uses when they really didn’t want to answer the question in the first place. (Hey genius, if you don’t want to get involved in the topic, don’t answer! Ha! So easy!)  So, here we go! Question: Have you ever stopped, even for just one second, to think about the abilities of change that a person has and how said person can use that ability in just one year? (Does that’s make any sense? Lord, I hope so!) Sometimes it can be less than that, because it honestly doesn’t have to take that long at all. Whether they had planned to make the change or it just sort of finally happened. It is still the fact that change ultimately happens whenever you decide you’ve had enough and you get up and you just, change! So many times we tell ourselves “I’ll just do it later.” Or “There will be more time tomorrow.” No. No there won’t. What are you waiting for?! Why keep making excuses? What if there isn’t a tomorrow….

I want to ask those who find me and then intend to stick with me and keep reading my posts, to please try to not take me, the things I say, and how I write them the wrong way. I’ll probably be all over the place for a while. I’m in no way saying that I have my life together and I can promise you I will never say that. I will never claim to be a perfect person or pretend that I don’t struggle on a daily basis with literally everything, just like everyone else. I want you to know I do not pass and will not pass any judgment whatsoever onto anyone. I want you to feel safe here. Always. I’m really hoping to someday form a close bond with you all. Even if I am still contemplating, doubting, and running every possible pro and con that I can come up with through my mind for why publishing this blog is either the greatest idea ever or going to be my biggest mistake. But, seriously what good am I going to do for myself or for anyone else if I just sit around doing nothing. Writing nothing…. How many times have you (or me for that matter) told yourself that you’ll just ‘do it later’ or ‘it can wait until tomorrow’. Later is now, GET OFF YOU ASS! Why waste the time I have left on this Earth, or the ability I was given to use while I am here?  I’ve realized quickly how extremely short life is and how soon everything can just be ripped from underneath you without any warning at all. I apologize for bouncing all over the place but I’ve already came to terms with that being one of the ways I get my A.D.D thoughts out there and just pray the people reading can keep up! Ha! 

 If we were to stop and think about the things that we are all capable of as humans, they’re absolutely limitless. I guess it’s sadly just a matter of how many of us actually decide to lose our complacentcy, stop being terrified of the “what if I fail’s”, finally grow a pair, and decide to take that enormous leap of faith and just do it. Believe it or not, all it truly takes is ONE minute of incredibly insane courage for you to decide that you can do whatever it is you want to do. So with a little encouragement from the people who have always been in your corner and YOU believing in YOU, without any self doubts holding you back,  Just start thinking of all the amazing things you, as ONE person, can accomplish. How freaking incredible is that?! And that’s just thinking about it! You haven’t even done anything yet! I’m not talking about the ‘shrugs shoulders’ I’ll believe if I absolutely have to…. because it’s the right thing to do… it’s what I was taught to do in kindergarten – kind of believing’ Nope, nope, nope!  None of that at all! (Aren’t you glad we aren’t in kindergarten anymore? Ha!) What this is, it’s the kind of believing in yourself where you know with every single thing you have to believe in, no matter what is thrown your way. What battles you may face. No matter how many times you feel like giving up. Even when the odds are against you. Even when you’ve tried so many times before and failed. Now don’t get me wrong. I’m probably one of the most skeptical human beings on the planet, when it comes to most things, but not all things. (Is that a terrible thing to admit in an inspiration/motivation/whatever you’re here looking for blog? Lord, I hope not. Okay. Just hear me out! I promise I have a point! *she says laughing*)  – There are TWO things I have absolutely zero skeptical doubts about – 1.) the power that writing holds – 2.) the power that people hold. (The power YOU hold)! Those my friends are where I am in NO way, shape or form, any kind of skeptic. They are the only two things combined that will make you feel like you are literally unstoppable. But, only if used correctly. Many people take the power they hold for granted. Honestly, most of them don’t even know they have any kind of power at all, how sad is that?! Could you imagine a world without Superman, Batman, or Spider-Man?! Hell no! How boring would our lives be without the utmost famed comic book heroes, ever! *you take the time to think this through* I know right, it would be downright awful. We have all been given a gift, and what we decide to do with that gift well, that just all depends on us. 

Everyone needs to know that they have at least one person who will always be in their corner. Standing beside them when it feels like everyone else has turned their backs. When the person in the mirror just forgets to look back, smile, and remind them that everything is going to be alright. Some days it just gets too damn hard to love yourself. Trust me, I’ve been there. I get it. That’s why I turned to writing. This isn’t just an outlet to make you feel better, but it will help us all feel better (I hope). I don’t want anyone to ever feel like they’re alone. I want you to know that you are not alone! 

Through this blog I hope to help woman (or just people for that matter) of all ages learn how to love the person that they are, for exactly who they already are – right at this very minute and not for anything other or less than that. I hate the idea that there is anyone struggling to not only love the person they are, but to even like themselves. It absolutely breaks my heart. Now, don’t get me wrong. This is not a self-help blog, because I am in no way trained or capable of actually teaching anyone or anything. I have not been to school for any one specific subject, I do not have a degree in a certain field. What I do have is life experience. Yes, I’m only 26. However, I have been through things in my life that I wouldn’t wish onto my worst enemy. But, I also wouldn’t change a single one of them because what my experiences did – they taught me, molded me, crafted me, and humbled me. They made me into the Caitlin I am today.  And for that I will forever be grateful and will NEVER look back. Looking back gets you nowhere, except for an old yesterday and a no good tomorrow. So why even bother with it. Look forward to new and better things while you still can! The world tries to tell us that we have to be greater, prettier, skinner, thinner, taller, shorter…. The fuck are all these “er’s”? Why can we just BE?! Be great, be pretty, be skinny, be fat, be tall, be short, BE US! Why is that so hard for the “world” to accept? I don’t get it, won’t get it, and unfortunately I probably never will get it. I guess that is just one thing to put on my list of questions  just to ask the Big Man when He meets me at the Pearly Gates. (If He even lets me in, hahaha!) 

Happy Reading! 

XOXOXO, Caitlin 

For the first time in…. EVER!

“Start a blog!” they said. “It’ll be fun!” they said. Well, here goes nothing!

For as long as I can remember I found myself wanting to write. I just always found 10 million reasons why that desire needed to be pushed to the back of my mind and usually it was because there was something I found held greater purpose at that moment in time. It wasn’t until I reached my twenties that writing took center stage and I realized I was actually good at it. Basically it all started with captions. You know, the things you find on social media and wonder how in the world someone could come up with something so insanely charming? Yeah, I was the person behind most of those. I could just sit for hours typing away on my phone putting a meaningful attachment to whatever it was I was about to upload. Normally I felt super insecure about my incessant rambling, but in reality after all was said and done, I would go back and become so inspired by what I just wrote I could hardly believe the words came from my brain. That is what I eventually want to become of this blog. I want to inspire others to believe they can achieve anything they put their minds to. Did I ever think for one second I would be sitting down at a computer, putting my words, thoughts, and ideas out there for millions (hopefully) of people to critique, judge, and become inspired by? Absolutely not! That is the BEST part of this whole thing. I get to share every single part of it with the people who have believed in me from the very beginning and with people whom I’ve never met. So what, I’m a newbie. Is that going to stop me? Heck no! So what, I have absolutely no clue what the hell I’m doing. Is that going to stop me? Ask me in about a week. Ha! I’m kidding! It took me a long time to finally grow a pair, make a blog, and actually do this. Why stop now? I know it will take time, effort, heartache, and discipline. But, what doesn’t? I’ve been married for 8 years, it can’t be any harder than that! It’s time to do something for Caitlin and I think I finally found the one perfect thing that I know will make me a better Mom, a better wife, and altogether a better human. Who knew writing had such amazing healing powers? Oh wait, I did!

I so look forward to this journey. It’s going to be one fun-filled wild and crazy ride!

 

XOXO, Caitlin